9

I had been no stranger to awkward sex in the past, but I never thought it could be that bad. Not in my wildest dreams had more teeth collided, or knees knocked against one and other or ass out hugs been thrown like rude epithets at the person who had agreed with a strait face to have me put my penis inside of her. Not for money, or under the influences of some mind altering chemicals like alcohol, or endorphins, but simply to make a baby, and with the expressed intent of finding true love.
We met at an nondescript coffee shop the first time, and made as little small talk as possible. This wasn't how I was used to meeting women, I know this because I remember what happened which is usually not the case. Often I'm too worried, or drunk, or anxious to really be paying attention--most girls don't realize it, but they never actually get a chance to make a first impression on me. Meeting Marie was different, and I remember every minute detail. The tall drink she ordered was a latte and she added sugar, she wore blue jeans and a white blouse, with a leather belt. She smelled like lavender. The toes sticking out of her black saddles were painted purple, and she had on what may have been the most obnoxious pair of sun glasses I had ever seen.
After 20 minutes, we went to a clinic to get blood tests, and when we both came back negative later that week we went to her place, ate spaghetti, climbed in bed and had some of the slowest, blandest sex I can recall. If the drunken party sex I had come to associate with first times were like short form figure skating routines, this first time with Marie was a compulsory event. About half way through she paused as if something was wrong, but started going again, and soon after that we were done. I got up to leave almost without event which was as new to me as meeting a girl sober. Too used to the dance of getting out of bed trying not to disturb my partner--if you could call them that-- which was always more delicate than the dance I had inevitably employed to get into bed in the first place. This was a welcome surprise. I like this. Before I drove off she pulled out a book, the cover was of a 20s era detective novel. I thought nothing of it.